死后重生
Fresh milk
Customer：I wonder if this milk is fresh.
Waiter：Fresh？Three hours ago it was grass.
新鲜牛奶
客户：我想知道这牛奶是否新鲜。
侍者：新鲜？三个小时以前它还是草。
Life after death
“Do you believe in life after death？” the boss asked one of his employees.
“Yes，Sir.” the new recruit replied.
“Well，then，that makes everything just fine，” the boss went on. “After you left early today to go to your grandmother's funeral，she stopped in to see you.
死后重生
“你相信人死后仍有生命吗？”老板问他的一个员工。
“是的，先生。”这个新员工回答说。
“哦，那么，这样说来一切就很正常了，” 老板继续说，“在你今早离开去参加你奶奶葬礼后，她来看你了。”
How did you ever get here
One winter morning，an employee explained why he had shown up for work 45 minutes late. “It was so slippery out that for every step I took ahead，I slipped back two.”
The boss eyed him suspiciously. “Oh，yeah？Then how did you ever get here？”
“I finally gave up，” he said，“and started for home.”
你是怎样来的？
一个冬天的早晨，一位员工向老板解释他为什么迟到了四十五分钟。“外面太滑了，我每向前迈一步，就要向后退两步。”
老板狐疑地看着他。“噢，是吗？那你是怎么到这里来的？”
“后来我决定放弃，”他说，“然后我就往家里走。”
单词&词组
fresh [freF] adj.新鲜的；无盐味的，淡的
recruit [ri5kru：t] vt.招募；组建
slippery [5slipEri] adj.滑的；不老实的
suspiciously [sE'spiFEsli] adv.怀疑地
知道不知道
有没有想起鲁迅先生的那句名言？The cow eats grass but gives milk. （牛吃的是草，挤出来的是奶。）关于milk，还有其他很多有趣的例句。
第一章 You only find out who's been swimming
naked when the tide goes out
只有退潮时，才知道谁在裸泳
To be polite
One day，Bill and Tom went to a restaurant for dinner. As soon as the waiter took out two steaks，Bill quickly picked out the bigger steak for himself.
Tom wasn't happy about that：“When are you going to learn to be polite？”
Bill：“If you had the chance to pick first，which one would you pick？”
Tom：“The smaller piece，of course.”
Bill：“What are you whining about then？The smaller piece is what you want，right？”
学会礼貌
一天，比尔和汤姆去餐馆吃饭。当服务员端上两份牛排时，比尔飞快地为自己挑了比较大的那块。
汤姆对此很不开心：“你什么时候能学会礼貌？”
比尔说：“如果让你先拿，你会拿哪个？”
汤姆说：“当然是小的那个。”
比尔：“那你还抱怨什么？小的那个不就是你想要的，不是吗？”
某次英文考试中翻英：
1.我穿上外套，却发现第一个扣子掉了。
2.他听见电话铃响，就过去接了电话。
正确答案应为：
1.I put on my coat and found its first button was gone.
2.As soon as he heard the phone ringing，he went to pick it up.
但是某生的答案是：
1.——！
2.Hello？
老师在黑板上写了一句：Time is money，并让同学们翻译。
有名学生答道：汤姆是玛丽。
上初一的时候，英语老师让我们读课文，恰好是一段对话，于是叫了一男一女两个同学来读。
男：What time is it now？
女：It's nine.
男：Let's go to bed.
女：We go to bed at nine.
全班绝倒。
Skinny dipping
One day Jimmy went down to the pond for a dip，but before he could dive in he spied his teacher，Mrs. Smith，emerging from nude bathing. When Mrs. Smith saw Jimmy，she grabbed the nearest object - which happened to be an old wooden box - and held it in front of her.
“Young man，I know what you're thinking，” she said.
“And I know what you're thinking，” replied Jimmy. “You're thinking that box has a bottom on it！”
裸泳
有一天吉米去池塘游泳，但在他跃入水里前看到他的老师史密斯小姐正从裸泳中冒出头来。当史密斯小姐看到吉米时，她赶紧抓过离自己最近的一件东西——碰巧是一个旧的木盒子，挡在自己前面，对他说：“年轻人，我知道你在想什么。” “我也知道你在想什么，”吉米答道，“你一定以为这个盒子是有底的！”
单词&词组
steak [steik] n.牛排，肉排
whin [(h)win] n.荆豆；棘豆
skinning dipping 裸泳，也可说nude swimming
dive in 头朝下跳入水中
spy [spai] v.看见，发现；间谍
nude [nju：d] adj.裸体；裸体的
grab [^rAb] v.抓住，吸引
bottom [5bRtEm] n.底部；末尾；臀部
知道不知道
说到裸泳，股神巴菲特（Warren Buffett）有句经典名言“You only find out who's been swimming naked when the tide goes out.”（只有退潮时，才知道谁在裸泳），用来指只有去除非理性市场因素，才能看清哪些公司具有真正的投资价值，哪些公司只不过是投机炒作。